Take a breath….

Is what I have been doing alot lately. Stress, anger, and fear are all things that can bring me to my “wits end” you could say. However the past year I have been trying to reshape my outlook on daily life. It is fragile and precious. The death of so many family members including my grandfather, aunt, and cousin as well as others has shaken me to my core. Shaking me so that I don’t want to waste a day. I want to make the world around me the best that it could be. Which requires loving, loving so much that I hold my tongue when it hurts. This has been a difficult task, being brought up to say what you feel. However I have learned that at times its good to say what you feel but in certain times, were the tension can be cut with a knife, its better to stop and re-evaluate your thoughts before they come out of your mouth. My niece Jaylan has helped me come to this realization. She is a firecracker, at one moment a joyous fun loving child heart and another a stomping sassing whip cracking short stack. When watching her on occasion I see this transformation and try and explain to her that her situation is not worth her reactions. However, this usually fails and her eyes role even harder and my fuse gets a little shorter. Even though she may not know it, I am thankful, because of her and our scuffles she has helped me realize that my situation is not worth my reaction. When I feel at the end of my rope I can take a breath and re-evaluate the repercussions of my reaction. Since doing this I have found a peace and happiness that I never knew. Not overreacting to the small things has given me a happier life, marriage, relationships, and out look on life and today I talked with my niece. After her blowing up to the brink of explosion over a Wii game, we talked about the fact that this is a game. Nothing in life is going to change because your striking out every player. The game has no memory so it wont even keep your score. Take a breath……and to my surprise she did. She started playing again, and when her brother got a home run and she lost the game I could see her holding back the firecracker in the grind of her teeth. I was proud. So proud I was almost in tears, when I told her this I could see the satisfaction in her smile. My situations in life at times are not worth my reaction to them. Take a breath and life will be a happier place, and a more valuable place as well.